A new kind of Magic ( Artemis Fowl and Harry Potter crossover)
by Awesomeness-in-words
Summary: Hagrid turns up at Fowl Mansion, claiming that Artemis is a wizard. And then that Butler is half-giant. Yowch. Set in a parallel universe, kind of. Basically all of the events happen by the time Artemis is 14.
1. Chapter 1: Stranger

Chapter One

Artemis would have assumed that the echoing footsteps pounding their way up the long drive belonged to Butler, if it was not for the fact that he was casting his huge shadow over the monitors he was studying..The giant advancing up the garden was as big as, if not bigger than, the towering bodyguard, but other than that, there was no resemblance . where Butler was buzz-cut and clean-shaven, the stranger was overflowing with frizzy, black hair . Although Butler was, as always, immaculately dressed in a three-piece pinstripe suit with a single holster (containing a fully loaded Sig Sauer mark three, with some unusual upgrades), the man was dressed in scruffy, voluminous brown robes, with a battalion of pockets, and must have been sweltering in the summer heat wave .

"Butler, investigate ."

The thick steel door swung open smoothly at the slightest touch, but Butler didn't stop to admire the swift movement, as Artemis would. He had a job to do . His hand was ready on his gun, just in case the stranger decided to make the biggest mistake of his life . His eyes narrowed dangerously as he studied the man . Artemis hadn't been exaggerating when he said he was big . The target was busy rummaging in one of his many pockets, and had somehow yet to notice Butler, a near-impossible feat . A giant finger silently flicked the safety switch, just in case the target was looking for his weapon .Butler had to admit, though, if he was a threat he wasn't a very well trained one.

When the man looked up to find himself staring down the barrel of a loaded gun, Butler expected him to scream . . . . or at the very least look scared .That's what people normally did when confronted by a giant man pointing a gun at their head . Not grin like the Joker . But that was precisely what the prisoner did. His eyes traveled past the gun and onto Butler, and as soon as he saw that they were almost the same size his face lit up like a candle*. He straightened up in several slow movements, still grinning, and released his hold on a small, tatty pink umbrella.

Never taking his eyes off the strange man, who for some reason was still grinning, Butler slowly lowered his gun and grabbed onto his robes, dragging him up the garden path with an iron grip. Although his smile faded slightly when he felt how strong Butler was, it quickly brightened again for no reason he could see.


	2. Chapter 2: Revelation

Chapter Two

Artemis Fowl swiveled in his chair, his raven hair falling into his mismatched eyes. He steepled his long, thin fingers on the desk and scowled at the prisoner. He could see that Butler was having no trouble keeping him constrained*, despite him being almost as large as the bodyguard. His cold eyes glared into the prisoner's dark, beady ones, half hidden behind his mane of frizzy hair, betraying no emotion though his eyebrows raised when he glanced at the tatty pink umbrella he was holding. " And he is? " His cold voice echoed round the small chamber, with Hagrid assuming the boy was talking to the bodyguard. He was surprised, therefore, when a head appeared out of the shadows at about a metre and a half off the ground and started telling Artemis everything.

" His name is Hagrid, and he is the keeper of keys and grounds at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry. Apparently you have recently developed magic, and they wish you to attend to help you gain control of your latent powers. The entire Lower Elements highly recommend that you attend, but will of course be sending a tail to ensure you do not get into any trouble , and to research their kind of magic. Hagrid has also been sent to investigate reports of half giants in the area, which we believe concern Butler. Oh, and how did you know I was here?"

" I have good hearing. Your wings are quite loud, if you know to listen for them. Now then. I'm guessing you were reading from a script, you never speak like that.

" Guilty as charged, I'm afraid Arty."

"Don't call me that, Holly . Half-giant? Well, we can discard that . I know his parents, and Juliet is of normal size."

Hagrid was gaping in disbelief. About halfway through the speech, the rest of the girl had appeared... and she was a metre tall with pointed ears and wings. And she knew everything. And on top of that, the bodyguard who was bigger than him was a pure muggle. Well, better speak up.

" 's true. Don' know how, but 's true. Here's u're letta'. "

Hagrid passed over a thin envelope, stamped with a school seal and written in dark emerald ink, and a typed sheet of paper with a ticket on top.

**" Platforn 9 3/4?****_ Honestly?"_**


	3. Chapter 3: The Leaky Cauldron

Chapter Three

Artemis's raised eyebrow somehow stretched a centimetre higher. Any more and it would fall off his head. He stared incredulously at the dodgy-looking restaurant, especially the creaking sign proclaiming the name of the establishment. "The Leaky Cauldron? How cliched- and obvious- can you get?" Rolling his eyes at Butler, who was looking very confused, he marched briskly into the wizarding world's exceedingly obvious doorway.

Butler was puzzled. They had been searching for the entrance to the wizard version of the mall, Diagon Alley, when Artemis stopped cold and stared at a wall between a record store and a second hand bookshop, and started muttering to himself about cliches. Holly, however seemed to see whatever it was Artemis was being incredulous about, so Butler assumed that whatever it was was visible only to magical creatures. Butler still couldn't wrap his enormous head around Artemis having magic. He knew it had happened before, but that was fairy magic, and Foaly had quickly removed it. This, according to Holly, was permanent and powerful, more along the lines of warlock magic instead of fairy.

****Artemis and Holly both began advancing towards the wall, seemingly having no fear of walking into a barbed wire fence. He tapped Holly on the shoulder with one of his sausage-sized fingers, and she got what he was thinking immediately. " Sorry big guy, if you can't see it, you can't come!" At that, both of them, fairy with a gun and soon-to be-wizarding criminal genius, walked into the wall and disappeared.


	4. Chapter 4: Diagon Alley

Chapter Four

The inside of the Leaky Cauldron was nowhere near as dingy as the outside suggested , but still paled in comparison to , say , the cellar of Fowl Manor. It looked like the interior of the average pub , minus the magic. Artemis was sure that if any normal human entered , they would be shocked into silence by the amount of magic zinging about the place , (Actually , they would probably see a wall between a record store and a bookshop , but that's beside the point.)but Artemis was not an ordinary human. It seemed that wizards were more sensitive to his oddness than 'muggles' , because most of them stopped and stared as he marched through the door. That might just have been the fact that he was 14 and wearing a million-dollar Armani suit , though.

Artemis' thin , white hands splayed across the gnarled wood as he pushed the stained door open to reveal... A brick wall. He sighed for what must have been the millionth time , and shook open his letter. Oh. Right. A secret entrance. He pushed a series of bricks in with his mismatched fingers , and the wall peeled back smoothly to reveal the real Diagon Alley. People stopped and goggled as Artemis strode down the wizarding world's second-best-kept secret wearing a tailored suit and tossing a large bag of banknotes in his spindly fingers. He was entirely amazed , but he was so used to concealing his emotions that he appeared to be merely impatient.

The steel-coated heels of his loafers clicked as he made his way past the various shops , which were selling everything from fried bat's wings to the stereotypical broomstick. As he approached the bank , which was apparently called Gringotts , a goblin he recognised slightly ran out and barred his way.

"Stop , sir! We have orders from...From... A higher authority not to let you in!"

Fowl grinned his vampire smile , melting the pathetic creature's backbone in seconds. Bending down , his mouth formed the unmistakable characters of Gnommish , the fairy language.

" Oh? Who? Will I have to report him to the LEP-recon officer who is currently hovering , shielded , by my left ear? " That simple sentence was enough to send the goblin squealing back to the bank , sparks leaping out of it's reptilian nose in fear , as it contemplated what a human must have done to learn the best-kept secrets of the fairy race.

Undaunted , Artemis continued towards Gringotts, a large grin on both his face and the face of the LEP-recon officer who was hovering, shielded, by his left ear.


	5. Chapter 5: Friends

Chapter Five

The door swung open as Artemis approached, obviously running on a motion-detector system and... Artemis mentally reprimanded himself. This was a shopping mall for wizards. It ran on magic. He continued to stalk into the shop, the tawny, winged cat that had been twisting about his ankles taken by surprise. Holly wearily flew behind him, her moonbelt straining with the piles of luggage, as she struggled to dodge the many shoppers. The only bit of his mountain of new possessions he was carrying himself was a loaded wallet.

Both a bushy auburn and a boy with an extremely messy black hair looked up as he entered what was apparently the best clothes store in the area, and their faces lit up as though all their christmases had come at once. In a flash, they were up from the seats in the waiting area and swarming him. The girl was grinning like a jack-o-lantern, while the boy merely looked amazed."Excuse me, sir, but do you happen to be Artemis Fowl?" they both asked in unison, to the immense amusement of a redhead who had been sitting with them. Artemis nodded proudly, but warily. THe girl squealed in uncontainable excitement, jumping slightly on the balls of her feet. The boy, who Artemis now noticed had an oddly-shaped scar on his forehead, spoke. "I didn't know you were a wizard, sir!" he said quietly, in an awed voice. Artemis chuckled. " Neither did I, until five days ago. I've come here for my school uniform." The bushy-haired girl went back to doing her fangirl impression, her voice coming out in a high-pitched squeak. "Oh! Are you going to Hogwarts? We could show you around, if you're in Gryffindor! But you'll probably be in Ravenclaw, after all your IQ is the highest in England..." She spoke in a confused rush, apparently playing no attention to grammar or the normal rules of speech. Artemis raised an eyebrow. "Gryffindor? Ravenclaw?" He asked, bemused.

Just as the pair had finished explaining what the different Houses where, the irritated redhead decided to come over and ask why his best friends were talking to a random stranger like he was an international Quidditch star, and a random stranger that looked like a snooty pure-blood at that. He stormed over to the group, glowering at them with clenched fists. " Guys? Who on earth is this git?" He scowled at the stranger, clearly irked for no reason Artemis could see. Hermione (For that was the bushy-haired girl's name, she had very enthusiastically told him)looked shocked briefly, and then proceeded to tell the boy his entire life story. Artemis flopped back into a waiting armchair and pinched the bridge of his nose. "This girl," he remarked dryly,"Knows more about me than I do!"'


End file.
